Snaps right to the most controversial statement made at the event - the one that got all the attention. We used a question hed to hammer that home. The initial headline was detail rich but actually less clear. But through testing, this quote proved far more engaging. Here’s another case where the first headline was fine. Removed unnecessary last names and focused on cleanly telling the narrative. Started to hone in on the better part of the story.Īnd we’re all in on the most compelling aspect, as determined by our readers. This is a perfectly good headline - detail rich (price, geography) with a hint of controversy.Īdded specifics, removed the lesser-known term “equity grant” and made it more conversational.įocused a lot of attention on the preference angle.Īttempted to bring out the exclusive nature of this story while adding context. Removed arcane “land bank” reference, added purpose.ĭrew out the conflict a bit with stronger language and simplified the issue. The sports version of the “Rain didn’t dampen the spirits of fest-goers” headline.Īdded details and, most importantly, scope. This one is particularly galling in that that headline is vague, a pun and also dead wrong, as the story specifically says they’re NOT falling down. So, I hope there’s a little added value in these 13 new examples. Why the before-after format? While every story’s unique, I think there’s more to be learned from studying empirically successful headlines than in just reading tips and theories. More compelling heds are more sharable on social as well.
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